The Toutlips Emails

Welcome to the home of the Toutlips Emails.

DP Wauchope and No Maple Bar presents The Toutlips Emails, a 31-part series plumbing the guttersnipes and spittlecocks of an industry that ties and twists the minds, necks, toes, and genitals of generation after generation of workers: human resources, the world’s second-oldest profession.

Each damming correspondence more damning than the last and plucked from the depths of despair and deposited weekly at No Maple Bar with a moist *plop*, typically when I remember to. 

We all know the classic HR memo:

One HR to rule them all, One HR to find them, One HR to bring them in all and in a small classroom bind them.

~Anonymous Old Earth HR Director

Now, at last—exclusively and weekly on No Maple Bar—we will delve into the depths of a department derided in despair and depravity: druman desources.

Hellish HR Contents 

• Preface 

• Risk 

• Success

• (In)Civility

• Meetings 

• Leadership

• Silos

• Lawyers

• Workplace Coalitions

• Keep You Mouth Shut

• Salary Expectations

• Office Politics

• Meetings

• The First Year

• Getting Stuff Done 

• Data Failure

• Change

• Comfort

• Perspective 

Author Insights